The Elephant in the Room: Moving On

 

Months have gone on since what I thought of as the end of this series. And, here I am, writing more. Why? Simple. I have absolutely no idea what to do with... all of this. 

So, let's recap: from 16-37, almost 38, I had continuous dreams of a black-haired girl, who aged linearly, properly, as you would have expected. These dreams covered her maturation, and included some pretty gnarly stuff, like being set on fire, fighting monsters for her, and then sitting with her as she grew up and tried to process whatever was going on in her waking life. I started recovering these dreams after literally dying and coming back. And then, once I wrote A Conclusive Holding Pattern, I had one more dream, which I wrote down, and then everything stopped. Or, I think it stopped. I have a feeling it's still going on, but for whatever reason it's been blocked.

Almost 17 years (I didn't dream at all in the Army, so there's four years gone there) of some of the most vivid, cathartic, awful, and tender things got burned into my memory, and then it stops.

What the fuck.

Now, I'm not judging what I'm writing. I'm just going to write and post. I've done that for years, and it's served me well.

But this one post, I am second-guessing that. Maybe I should.

But here we go.

I know why I was allowed to remember. I've heard other people's experiences, enough of them to know I'm not alone in having this kind of thing happen. The difference is I was allowed to experience it sharply enough to not be able to deny it. And it was a mercy that I did. See, I had stopped believing in my ability to be a good person. It wasn't that I thought I was a bad guy, it was that I could no longer believe I was a good person, in any capacity. I had no confidence in my ability to do the right thing.

These... whatever they are... were forced back into my consciousness to make me unable to turn away from one fact: I do actually have a spark of goodness left. It's there. I can't fight it. I can't hide from it. I am capable of great acts of goodness for people I don't know. And I know this person is in the waking world, right now. I know this. I also know talking to this person, just out of the blue, will do no one any good. The decision to not bother her was made so quickly that it barely counts as a decision. It was reflex.

I saw her. I knew it was her. And I knew somehow that it was none of my business whether she remembered or not.

Okay, cool, again reflex.

It's an act of grace I would dearly love to deny, but I can't. I know what I chose to do, and I know it's binding, and that's not  the thing that I care about.

I cannot stop asking myself why the dreams stopped. I can feel it needed to happen. The ability to handle the dreams was slipping from me. I had four years of consciously remembering them in real-time going on, and that takes a toll, and it was time to let me rest. I get this.

In my head.

But four years.. it becomes a part of you. And now it's not. And it's not even been six months, and I simply do not know how it's supposed to flush out of me.

I am not trying to find a solution.

I am simply admitting that, on some level, there's an open question and I don't know how to address it, but I'm going to try to here:

What was the point?

I'm not sure, but I do know the following things. 

Lies have an actual impact upon your body. Take it from someone who has been facing the truth of two childhood rapes and multiple years of abuse atop it: every single time I have uncovered a lie told to me by my oppressors that I believed, it hurt me, and not just psychologically and spiritually, but especially physically. It has always been a drain. And I have lot of lies I internalized, and the further I get into this the more I realize just how much it has screwed up my physical health. One of the greatest obvious lies of the modern age is that believing a lie can be healthy. The concept of the "noble lie" has absolutely no basis in reality, whatsoever. Sorry. I've yet to encounter one. 

So there's no "who cares if it's factual or not, as long as it heals you?" If it heals you it's because there's truth in it. Period.

The truth, on the other hand, has always had a positive impact, once ingested properly. There are hard truths, and those hard truths can be extremely difficult to figure out how to contextualize. If you are withholding the truth from someone because they may not be willing or able to properly utilize it, that is a very different conversation. You withhold the truth because it may not be useful, but it is not an ideal state, and hopefully you will be able to end that. The truth is something that must be frequently wrestled with, but doing so, in hope, is always a healing process.

Always.

And I know this: every single moment of these last years has been a gauntlet, right to the face. Finding the black-haired girl in the real world was horrifyingly difficult, but it awoke tenderness in me that I didn't know I could have for my wife and children. The effects of knowing the dreams hurt, but it kept making me a kinder, gentler person, in remembering them. Dying and coming back from the dead with this vision burning in my chest was extremely harsh but, once again, the effects have been healing, soul-mind-body. 

Lies.

Cannot.

Heal.

Painful as it is to admit, losing access to the dreams as they happen in real-time has also pushed me forward. I have had to learn to address the present again, in ways I forgot I even could. Knowing who the black-haired girl is is heinously difficult, just in the sense that I wonder what she knows, but being happy for her, without having a conscious part in it anymore while knowing I once did conscious knowledge, has made me a kinder, gentler, person. It's not comfortable, and it's made me face up to parts of me I'd much rather forget existed, but I am definitely healing.

There.

Are.

No.

Noble.

Lies.

And this realization that truth handled in hope always heals, and one cannot heal from lies, is a knowledge that is slowly but surely seeping into my bones. Little bit by little bit, more and more, I believe it. The random flashes that she is aware of me, which sometimes get me willing to try living again, are born of a genuine insight, however strange it may be. I need do nothing other than know it and let that knowledge heal me.

Somewhere, somehow, there is another person living a life and loving and living to the utmost, who occasionally looks into the sky, and wonders at the feeling that someone is looking back.

And one day, she will see me and go "I know you". And wave. She will be surrounded by her friends and family and be so happy.

And I, from my own tribe, mine own statistically impossible tribe, will smile. And wave back. And say "Yes, yes you do."

That is something to hope for. Hope does not disappoint.

The Fall of the King of Sota: Chapter Eight

 

I learned more about how to host a session in these last 19 days than I have in the last 20 years. And it was born because of pressure I found to be extreme.

So, first things first: we decided to play Crescendo two weekends a month. We're playing twice in those weekends, because there's too many players for me to run all at once, so the chaos is just incredible. The interlude plotting needed more room to breathe. So, we all talked like adults and figured it out.

I had two weddings to go to. Two weekends, back to back. I have several small children. So. It was going to be a shitshow, logistically. I warned everyone about this, and told them that I couldn't necessarily be on time with interlude orders. It was just going to be too much for me. Everyone gave the green light, told me to go at whatever pace I could.

The following was constructed by just... listening to what people wanted to do, and smashing it all together with a few simple dice rolls.

August 10th-17th

Silvy, after the three days of terror are done (see Chapter 7), helps with the survivors of the demonic possession. It’s contained, and very effectively.

Lord Arriquad grabs any food stores being hoarded, turning them into a City Army on a group of well-guarded wagons. He distributes food from these stores to fighting-men (anyone who joins the City Army) plus a couple of dependents each.

The City Army guards the food-wagons, and react to news of attacks by monsters or the eldritch by showing up and fighting. Fighting-men are more valuable than general civilians. There are regular patrols. They spread the idea that we, the survivors of the destroyed city, are the favoured, graced by Saint Laurentius, destined to conquer new lands - starting with the weak and iniquitous Newport. KING LUCIAN SHALL RULE”, is the declaration of the City Army.

After fording the river, a creature in a cloak, riding a fell beast, announced himself to the refugees. He called himself Abbadon , and claimed Newport as his domain. King Lucian greed to not usurp Abaddon. They merely needed a place to rest, as the peoples of New Sota City were tired. Abaddon withdrew, as the refugees made their way to Newport.

August 18th-27th

A strange man was seen carrying a sack as the convoy got to New Sota City. Silvy and Seren cornered him as he ran, and took the sack. The strange man got away. 

The bag was huge. And squeaked. And moved. 

Sily and Seren burned the bag. 

Suddenly there was a loud incoherent babbling, and the whole convoy turned on them. Miraculously, Silvy got away unscathed. Seren was not so lucky: his head was severely hurt. A kind family took him in. 

The charred corpses of rats were found in the bag, along with human bones.

Abbadon tries to take 100 soldiers from Arriquard for his own force, at the blessing of King Lucian. Warned by Eoc, Lady Marie manages to get ahead of Abbadon's propaganda and stops him. No one follows him.

King Julian, backed by Lady Marie's money, buys some of the slums in the southwest part of Newport, land generously granted by Lord Phillipe.

A healed Seren presents himself to King Julian and Lord Arriquard when they are settled, pledging allegiance.

A night time raid happens on the smithing guild, with a bunch of weapons stolen. The weapons are found very easily in the New Sota City Army.

Teller, head of the farming guild in Newport City, is found dead, smothered by a pillow. Nobody has any idea who it could be.

The forests across the river begin to burn, and it's rumored that something is dancing amidst the flames, singing an insane song.

August 28th: Chapter Eight

Not a single dice was rolled, and yet the tension was here. And the formula was simple: give a goal, give a time limit. It's so simple. As soon as there's a time limit and a general idea of how the world works, everyone starts to game it. They start to ask questions to try and figure out any niche.

This is the first time the players tried to game the Myth itself. And it worked, like a freaking charm. 

Sit down. Create a context. Give a problem. Set a time limit. Let the players figure it out.

Literally nothing else is necessary. If the mechanics of your game don't provide a framework for that, your game is worthless.

Evolving Braunstein Tech: Initial Situations

 

I have decided that the Non-Stop Braunstein is my thing.

That means all players meet regularly, in an evolving conflict, scheming between sessions in a rigorously enforced time schedule. The Judge sets up the intial conflict, maintains fog of war and enforces the general shape of the conflict. 

But there’s not just one kind of conflict. Below are the kinds of conflicts I have found. “Law” is defined as caring for the weak and group cohesion, best exemplified in monarchy. “Chaos” is defined as the triumph of the strongest individual, best exemplified by dictatorship.

If this is your first time being told monarchy and dictatorship are opposed, you got some serious reading to do.

Why Define Them?

Because implications choke communication, long-term. If you use these terms as the beginning of your conversations, to describe, rather than to restrain, everything will work smoother. If you find the game is changing its central kind of conflict, talk about it!

Anyone using this terminology as a straitjacket is not using these terms as intended.

Types of Conflicts… So Far

This list is hardly exhaustive. This is going to go in the Crescendo Core Rulebook. If you know of other types of conflicts, please suggest them!

Law Purifying

All the players are part of Lawful factions, with Chaos pressing in. The players will need to prove who is the most lawful, who takes care of the weak and the group the best. 

Chaos, managed by the Judge, provides a foil and canon against which the lawful prove themselves. If the lawful aren’t doing their jobs, chaos will figure it out quickly and punish the players.

We're currently running this kind of conflict for The Fall of the King of Sota.

Chaos Degenerating

The forces of Chaos have won. The strongest have prevailed… and now we play out Law trying to return. The players get to ride the elevator to Hell, with gusto. It’s a grand catharsis!

The Judge plays out the forces of law attempting to rebuild, with military and culture and civilization trying to renew in the face of the wasteland that is Chaos.

Law vs Chaos

This is really straightforward. Players are divvied up between the two alignments evenly, and whoever wins, wins. The Judge sits back and ensures fair play.

Judgment Day

An end of everything has come. The players are divvied up evenly, and the Judge tries to destroy them, openly.

Red Tape vs Secrecy

From the conversations setting up Rylothstein. A large bureaucracy against a small insurgency. The bureaucracy must survive its red tape so it can find the insurgents, who are flexible but must not be found.

Free for All

From the conversations for the Streetstein. A bunch of equal factions who are trying to win. 

Returning To Tenra Bansho Zero

 

Tenra Bansho Zero is one of the most influential games I have ever read. Its translated titled ("All Things Under Heaven and Earth") is literally what I named this blog after... and I have also never played a full game of it. 

We'll get back to why in a minute. 

But. 

In so many ways, this one game has defined my tastes. At one point, I gave my very nice copy to Pau Villarreal of The Warning. Well, I don't know if she got it. I sent it via the mail, and have to hope it got there. I figured she'd like the setting and it would get her imagination pumped. Hopefully I was right, but we'll never know. Ironically enough, the giving away of this book began an era of reading and investigation into the BR/OSR... which is coming to an end, as I picked up another copy. Not the fancy one. You can't find that one for a reasonable price, not anymore. Pau's got it, and I hope she's enjoying it, assuming she kept it.

The heart of TBZ is The Aiki-Kiai-Karma system. Each character has three Fates, which are these really open-ended statements of character, such as "Emotion: Hatred of Lord Kutuwara", or "My sword is the answer". Very open-ended, very simple stuff. Whenever you do something awesome with these Fates that everyone else likes, they can give you Aiki chits. You can spend Aiki, but it's not very powerful. However, if you wait until a good moment, you can convert Aiki into Kiai, which functionally does the same thing as Aiki, but you get a ton more of it. Like, 5x-6x more. Tons. If you spend Kiai, it gets marked as Karma. If you accumulate 108 Karma you became an Asura, a demon who is utterly incapable of change. And you then hand your character sheet to the GM, who then uses him to torment the other players.

It cannot be understated how much fun this one little system is. Players handing each other chits, which they then have to hoard in order to be of use, and then have to be careful about spending, is... there's nothing like it. There just isn't. People begin to lean into what the other players like, creating a feedback loop where everyone slowly gets more and more into their character. This enthusiasm transmutes into power in the game... and can lead to tragedy. There's something so layered, so genuine, so beautiful, about this loop. No other game comes close to it. Burning Wheel gets close, and Crescendo gets closer yet, but nothing beats the immediacy and depth  of Tenra Bansho Zero.

The setting book is also the single best setting book I've ever read. Ever. It is a blanket of loose ends, open spaces, unsaid things, and tragedies. There's tons of mundane details in here, all of which are just right. It is the only setting book I've ever read that justifies its existence, and we'll get back to why that is in a second, as well.

That's two grenades. Jeez.

The setting book is short, sweet, and knows exactly how much information to dole out. I could probably make scenarios out of this sucker for years.

Two and a half grenades!

Let's pull one now! Why did I give the game away? To a person who doesn't know me? Well, simply put: I couldn't figure out a way to pitch it to people! The hyper Asian setting is not something that actually appealed to my players at the time. The mechanics are great, but we had Burning Wheel, which scratches a very specific itch, and we now have Crescendo, which scratches that itch better. TBZ is not a campaign game. The mechanics aren't suited to it, period. The changes are so deliberately rapid that you shouldn't necessarily make sequels with the same characters. I didn't have anyone who needed just a quick pick-me-up.

So I gave it away. Like I said, I hoped Pau would get something out of the setting book.

After that, a funny thing happened: I started to slowly investigate the BR/NU/O-SR. I kinda figured I could find something to pick up the "adventure game" niche that TBZ so nicely filled, which Burning Wheel and Crescendo so definitely don't. And... well... I didn't, overall. I got ACKSII and 1e and Wight-Box, which is actually pretty good! Not to mention the Into the Odd family of games! I love them and will use them! But... they didn't scratch the itch. Not the very specific itch that was slowly developing: a game I could sorta pour myself into, and bring out for short bursts, with people either willing to take a chance or okay with just doing a one-shot. And, honestly, I wanted to give this incredible game another chance.

So. I picked it up again. I am just going to go and make a scenario, walk into my workplace, hand them the character sheets, and tell them they're playing. They'll play, because they're bored and we have nothing else to do at some very particular hours. And we'll play. And we'll have a blast. I know we will, because they trust my taste and are just bored enough. Just.

And then I’ll do it again.

And again.  

Maybe that’s the point. After years of circling this game—giving it away, hunting for something that could replace it, finally buying it back—I’m done waiting for the perfect table or the perfect pitch. Tenra Bansho Zero has already shaped how I think about play, about character, about the quiet tragedy of becoming something you can’t take back. Now I just want to see what happens when other people get their hands on those chits and those Fates.

I’ll throw it at my coworkers. 

I’ll throw it at my kids. And if it works even half as well as I remember it working on the page, I’ll finally stop treating this game like a secret I was never quite ready to share.

Onward!

1:1 Time With John McGowan

 

This was an amazing conversation I got to have with John McGowan! Thanks, John, for coming and talking!

The Fall of the King of Sota: Chapter Seven

 

This chapter session was a chef's kiss. It took chapter six and utterly turned it on its head. There's really not a lot more to be said, as the session really does speak for itself.

I suppose the one bit of commentary I will put in is that the role of Weaver really comes into play here. The two players are corralled back to each other, where their natural aspects naturally rub against each other.

This is a ridiculously easy game to run. Just herd the cats back into the octagon, and watch!

Chapter Seven (8/9)

The Fall of the King of Sota: Chapter Six

 

This continues to be the greatest gaming I have ever had. The last two weeks on the Discord have been some of the best and chaotic scheming I've ever seen, leading to a short but extremely climactic Chapter, where everything changed.

We are down to one mortal city: the criminal haven of Newport. And we have an entire city's worth of people at it from New Sota City.

July 24-August 7

People were going back and forth in the DMs for the longest time. But it all came down to this one short statement:

A high-stakes propaganda war between King Julian, Father Laurentius, Arriquard , and Lady Marie played out. King Julian and his helpers began to spread news of Lady Marie's debauched evil, and how cruelly she had used him. Against all expectations, Lady Marie pre-empted them with propaganda of how much help she had actually done for the rice farmers and the city, and her adopted daughter was much talked about in terms of her generosity. 

Arriquard successfully began raising an army for King Lucian's church, which was being set up against Mother Elise.

BUT ON AUGUST 4TH

Were-crocodiles, an entire army of them, invaded from Montport. Turns out they had totally taken over that city! And they showed up out of the blue! However, thanks to Arriquard's efforts in the previous five days, there just so happened to be a standing army that was forming.

The fighting was intense, and many died. However, New Sota City prevailed, and the were-crocodiles were driven away.

It all came down to one problem: when were the were-crocodiles showing up? It took some time to figure out exactly how it worked out... but it just so happened to occur just when everyone else was at enough of a critical mass to where it didn't turn into a total slaughter. And then the defenders rolled really high.

Chapter Six: August 7th

The fallout of this Chapter Session cannot be understated. Two of the most chaotic characters in the whole game are dead, and to save everyone else. New Sota City has been abandoned. There's an entire train of people heading to the worst city of the old world... which happens to be the last one.

What could go wrong?

Read-Thru of Wight-Box: Book One, Heroes

 

Okay, look, we gotta talk really quick.

Coz I screwed up.

I backed this day one. Was really excited for it. Went through all three books. And went, "Meh, I'll look at this later."

If the Basic Expert reads this, yeah, I slept on this.

Okay, crow's been eaten. Onward.

So, after a few months of just not looking at these three little booklets, I just picked 'em up on random. I'd not given up on the game, just it had been sitting there for an opportune moment. Well, this was that moment. I sat down, followed the directions, and made a character in... ten minutes. Like, a fully formed character. Ready to go. And a good amount of detail for something so fast, too!

That's absolutely crazy.

Some of the directions (like with elves) could have been clearer, but a quick internet search and pinging B/XE's Discord server answered them. It is essential to mention that they're friendly bunch, who put up with me pretty well! So, I was able to get my answers pretty quickly. One could argue that I shouldn't have to do that, but I've written enough rulebooks to know that is always going to be a thing, so you may as well have your community be friendly while you're at it.

For some reason, what was an otherwise unremarkable book stuck at out me this time. I've found that I have plenty of stuff where I have to put some intensive effort into setting up. I generally prefer it this way, to be honest. I like having some set up, because I like having thematic coherence; I find it fun. 

However, there's something just so incredibly pleasing about being able to sit down, roll 3d6 six times, and then make the best of it. It is a fundamentally different experience, but I am a glutton for collecting experiences, so, I am beginning to find that Wight-Box is scratching an itch that I didn't know I could have... with a bit of crunch and depth. Which Wight-Box has.

But no thieves, kthx.

And honestly? That’s fine. Because what Wight-Box delivers in return is something I didn’t realize I was missing: pure, unfiltered play. No sixty-page character backstory required. No session zero spreadsheet. Just roll your stats, pick a class, and go be a murderhobo (or a noble defender of the realm, whatever floats your boat). There’s a beautiful honesty to it.

I’ve spent years chasing elaborate campaigns, and thanks to Crescendo they my track record of successful launches are getting higher and higher. And that's great! But Wight-Box just hands you a little sailboat and says “the wind’s already blowing.” 

Ten minutes later you’re actually playing the damn game. 

And that's pretty nice.

The Fall of the King of Sota: Storystein 1 (1-5)

 

Last night the players saw the full scope of Crescendo 0e. The Storystein is a capstone event designed with one view in mind: force players to change their status quo. Players turtle and never really get their goals done, and it shouldn't be up to the Weaver to make them do it. And yet, turtling is really bad for gameplay and stories. So, what does the Storystein do? Force consequences. You either get what you want, or you don't, but stop pussyfooting around and move on.

This forcing of consequences then coalesces the narrative as you are playing, as opposed to after the conclusion of the campaign.

The set up is simple. Players provide a written case for why their case should be the only one to win. Their arguments are rated and given dice. After rolling initiative, the players begin to roll to see who gets what they want, one a time. The first person to succeed automatically makes everyone else lose.

Storystein 1 (Oikoya 23)

The status quo change is pretty profound. I am hooked. Let's do this. I can't wait for the next one!

The Fall of the King of Sota: Chapter Five

 

One of the things that is hard to communicate about Crescendo is not only how different each session feels, but how the game absolutely refuses to go according to your expectations. You absolutely cannot follow the rules as intended and not be surprised each session. There is nothing quite like the sheer level of tonal variety that Crescendo provides.

And this session showcases that reality really well.

The players and I thought this session would be an absolute bloodbath: the elf who keeps the evil within Cleft Mountain sealed away and the monstrous Abbadon, together in a session! That should not have worked out.

And yet.

This session brings out tech that I didn't even think may be necessary anymore: the direct challenging of Beliefs by the Weaver. Turns out, sometimes the players do manage to pull it together, and the Weaver has to be ready to make up situations that subvert and challenge their Beliefs/Debts.

ALSO: apparently I have a lot of homework. The players walked in with lore based off of what I had presented in the Setting Bible, in the first session, it turns out I may have more homework coming up. This was fantastic! People are understanding the bones of the setting well enough to riff of it and tell me what the setting does.

Chapter Five: Oikaya 19

The Fall of of the King of Sota: Chapter Four

 

This. This right here. Is the steel chair session. People started getting used to the system, and it just.. it sang. Crescendo's mechanics are reactive to player action. They intensify it and push it back into the fiction, making things wild and unpredictable.

And in this session, for the first time, I saw those mechanics sing. They weren't just good or even fantastic. Crescendo actually hit a Platonic ideal.

Oikaya 13-17

And, of course, it all began in the Discord. At the end of Chapter Three, we had a mob march on Lady Marie's compound. It all looked gone for Lady Marie. 

And then this happened.

Lady Marie’s forces, after three grueling days of fighting with the rioters, defeated them. The mob would have gotten Lady Marie, if not for the timely intervention of a young nobleman, named Eric. A rice farmer named Arriquard, along with  Father Laurentius, who were leading the mob, were injured and went into hiding… at least until Fr. Laurentius reappeared and began preaching about the evils of the nobility, particularly Lady Marie and Mother Elise, who were employing long-forgotten dark elf rituals to gain immortality through drinking children’s blood. He then began to give generously to the poor and homeless.

Ghosts have been spotted in the ruins of New Sota City, post-riots. People are beginning to wonder if the town isn’t legitimately cursed.


On Oikaya 17, a bunch of stones dropped from the sky, killing some, injuring others.

Dice were rolled and nothing went the way we expected. Lady Marie didn't go down, she got stronger. Not a damn thing that we thought was going to happen, did.

Chapter Four (Oikaya 17)

And then this utter apeshit craziness happened.

I don't have words. I genuinely don't. Cal and I talked on the phone afterwards, and were just... totally babbling about it. You have to see it to believe it. Every second is utter craziness. It really can't be summed up. It is a Platonic ideal.

Next week is the first Storystein. And that is when we make RPG history, because nothing else even remotely like this exists, anywhere. 

Demon City: Read Thru, Part Two

 

Welcome back! This week, we're continuing on with my read-thru of Demon City.

This game has found me in the middle of a really interesting transition, and it's relevant for this part of the read-through, so we're going to get into that first.

Yes, There is Objectively Good Design in TTRPGs

We have to get this out of the way, because apparently it's a controversial point. There's good game design, as an objective reality.

I will define what good design is for the purposes of this blog post:

Design that, when used properly, gives back more than it takes.

Random tables are objectively good design. They almost always give back more than they take. Obviously, it's possible for implementation to screw up a random table. Yes, it's possible to screw up implementation, but it's pretty hard to really screw up a random table. The point is, a random table takes a load off the GM that allows him to not spend so freaking much mental power during the game. It is objectively better to have a random table over not having one. Sorry not sorry.

There is also bad design:

Design that, even when used properly, takes more energy than what it gives back. 

The entirety of F.A.T.A.L. is an example of bad design. Overcomplicated, bloated, and needlessly detailed... oh and it's also one of the most hatefully stupid games of all time. Hilarious to read, though!

1:1 PVP Is Superior

So, for the last month and a half I've been running a 1:1 PVP  game, also known as a Braunstein. The players are all inherently against each other, and plotting against each other, Diplomacy-style. I don't plan situations, I just take their orders, make sure they make sense, and then adjudicate how everything collides together. Then, when the play sessions come up, I just focus on shaking things up as hard as I can, forcing the players to reconsider what they're doing.

And it is objectively the most fun I have ever had running a game. Just flat out. It's not close, it's not subtle. I don't plan. I don't push. I don't even think about the future. I manage. I just sit back, people fuck around, and they find out.

I have had a more meaningful time. You've got tape, right on this blog, of some campaigns I've run that are magical. Actual magic. 

But I have not had a more fun time running a game, ever. It's awesome.

Yeah, I spend "just about" as much time adjudicating actions between sessions as I did prepping, if not more so, but it's not prep: it's play. It's not work, it's fun! I'm having a blast! I get regular installments of this completely unhinged fantasy EVENT. All for the low price of setting up the scenario and telling everyone not to play nice.

So, to recap, 1:1 PVP gets me more enjoyment for far less work, if not less time, and has pretty much redefined what I want out of a game.

So This Game Found Me At An Interesting Juncture

Two months ago? I would have eaten this game up with a freaking spoon. Immediately. 

But Father Time is fleeting and cruel.

Now, I am absolutely not in the target audience of this book, not anymore. See, you have to convince me that leaving 1:1 PVP would be just as worthwhile as running it. And that is an ask. A real ask. Because I now got a system that automatically maintains moment, right through missed sessions and weird adult life schedules and other basic problems of "stop time" in RPGs, and I am absolutely happy with it. You have to really sell me on playing this game at this point.

The sections we're covering in the book today are the Host advice, worldbuilding help, actual pitches for campaigns, and some "sketches" to help the Host riff.

The Host Advice

Oh man, Father Time is so cruel. This should have stolen my heart. And two months ago, it would have. There's a distillation of all the different kinds of horror "plots", sorta like plot infrastructure for Hosts to use, without railroading players. And this section is brilliant. If you're not running 1:1 PVP.. you need to read this section. Like, you owe Zak S for this part of the book, alone. Zak breaks down different kinds of plot structures that players can move around in so thoroughly and well that it would be stupid to not get the book.

But, given that this wasn't two months ago? But was just read a few days ago?

Yeah.

I don't particularly need it. Which is incredibly weird. It's so well-written, and I could see adapting some of it, particularly the "dungeon style" plot, but this is fantastic advice for something I don't plan on doing that much anymore. It is, without a doubt, the best guide for "stop time" TTRPGs ever written.

Not close.

Worldbuilding Help

I loved literally every sentence in this section. The book breaks down how to access archives, how Uber drivers can be useful, and how the FBI actually works in a way that I find relevant. There's not a bad word in this section, other GMing guides should be legitimately ashamed that they don't think to put stuff like this in their games, and if they do, do it better. Kthx.

Seriously. Again, this is S+ tier stuff. Literally no notes.

Campaign Pitches

How the fuck is this section even better???

So, Zak breaks down how to make distinctive campaigns, with little modifications and hacks to the system to reward certain kinds of actions. If you're playing the game, just steal these ideas, outright. But if you're not, this section is a masterclass in manipulating the system lightly to provide a compelling campaign pitch to your players. Literally it's all perfect. This one section sells me on running Demon City by itself. I cannot praise it enough. There's about a half-dozen pitches in here, and they's even a Stranger Things kinda a pitch, and it's awesome.

Sketches

So, this one's a bit of a weird section, but it's essentially a bunch of just half-baked enough ideas that you can insert into a campaign. There's tons of ideas on how to weaponize crime in the interest of horror games. This section is worth revisiting, from time to time, to have it jog your imagination. Zak S literally rewrote how I think RPG books should be written, with this one section.

So Yeah. 

Demon City is an absolute masterclass in TTRPG design. Zak S cooked here. The Host advice is the best "how to actually run horror without railroading" material I've ever read. The worldbuilding section is criminally practical. The campaign pitches are pure rocket fuel, and the sketches section single-handedly raised my standards for what an RPG book should deliver.

If you're running traditional stop-time games—especially horror, mystery, or modern-day campaigns—you should buy this book yesterday. It will make you a better GM, full stop. Even if you never run Demon City itself, the ideas here will level up whatever you're doing.

But for me? Right now? It's bittersweet.

This game found me at the exact moment I fell in love with something else. 1:1 PVP has ruined me (in the best way). It delivers consistent chaos, player-driven drama, and zero prep guilt in a way that feels almost unfair to everything else. I still love what Demon City is doing. I respect the hell out of it. Parts of it will definitely leak into my Braunsteins. But the honest truth is I'm not rushing to switch back to traditional campaign play.

Father Time is cruel like that.

This was Part 2 of my read-through, focusing on the GM-facing material. There's still at least one more part to go. If I do not see you next week, I do not blame you.

It is no easy road.

The Fall of the King of Sota: Chapter Three

So, this was the first time we were able to have two Chapters in a week. It did not disappoint. We had a blast, as things in New Sota City and at Cleft Mountain completely fell apart. We're three chapters in, and almost all the initial plans have completely fallen apart, and everyone is scrambling.

Chapter Three (Oikaya 12)

This is definitely the session where the players discovered just how bad it was tanking Conditions. Since recovering from Conditions (which you have to do first) removes you from scheming between Chapters, the players from Chapter Two are almost entirely at the mercy of the events during Chapter Three!

But you need Conditions to advance your character.

Oops.

The Seraph Omega Rangers: Session 2

 

"RISE"

We decided that about two weeks had gone by. Jackson and Janet were part of a survivor group, who were raiding the nearby Whole Foods after dark, picking through the adjacent strip mall under cover of night to avoid the flying rock vultures. While there, they noticed that people with guns were hoarding the canned goods. When others confronted them, they brandished their weapons.

Jackson and Janet snuck off, morphed, and came out to talk to the people with the guns. They tried to talk with the gun-toters, who were terrified. But, when the green and pink Seraph Omega rangers chose to be gentle, they calmed down a bit and explained they were just trying move the cans into a nearby underground storm shelter. When the Seraph Omega Rangers asked if the others could share the cans, they were told that could be arranged. Everyone relaxed

Everyone minus two. Jackson and Janet realized that two people had just... vanished... while the talking had been going on.

They didn't show up again the next day.

Two more people vanished after the next foraging foray.

And the one after that.

This next time, Janet and Jackson noticed that George, an older man, had different colored eyes: they were supposed to be blue, and were brown instead. He also moved with an odd predatory grace, which was subtle but evident enough. Nobody else seemed to notice. George glided up to Janine, a 14 year old girl who had just lost her parents the other day, and seemed to be comforting her. But it wasn't actually George, and Jackson and Janet knew they couldn't leave Janine with George.

So Janet and Jackson followed, quietly. They took great care to not be spotted as George and Janine drifted farther and farther back. Suddenly George turned fuligin, the color darker than black, and began to wrap around Janine like a bedsheet. His body thinned, and his head grew and began something that resembled a pterodactyl's.

Jackson and Janet morphed immediately, and the surprised "Pterrordactyl" dropped Janine. Jackson and Janet knew that if they didn't hurry, the stone vultures that soared the skies would descend upon them in the dozens. Janet pulled out her pink ranger bow, and Jackson pulled out his green ranger lance. They stabbed and shot the Pterrordactyl, who died surprisingly fast, without a scratch to either ranger. They quickly demorphed, and Jackson picked up the unconscious Janine.. only to have the freaking stone vultures see them.

They barricaded themselves into the strip mall. And outlasted the stone vultures, who were trying to break in. When daylight came and the stone vultures left, they went back to their homes.

Hungry.

The Fall of the King of the Sota: Chapter Two

The single greatest gift of 1:1 is an inherent sense of momentum. The real world for adults can be really nasty- more than half the group wasn't able to really participate because of sudden schedule shifts and the usual exhaustion of being an adult. But, because we had someone, somewhere, plotting and driving things forward, the people who couldn't do as much didn't have to feel bad. They could just check in, see things were happening, smile, and promise to get back to it as soon as they could. This creates a strong sense of belonging to a community, as people are all contributing to this project that will go on without them, but greatly values who they are as individuals.

Ransu 28 - Oikaya 9

New Sota City was the only place anything that can be reported publicly happened, as most of the people at Cleft Mountain were either caught up in family emergencies or were MIA. The following was dropped 

The spice merchants are hiring thugs to kill each other (the same guys and the thugs are also city guards). The fruit seller’s sister is dead, her husband is on the run and her brother murdered the minstrel in the middle of a show. The money changer got taken away by the guards and hasn’t been seen or heard of since.

corruption, greed, violence and paranoia have overtaken the market. All the merchants are plotting against each other, ripping people off and other terrible mischief. People in the city are furious with the price gouging, accusations and all that. They end up rioting and doing some lynching. The guards show up and kill a bunch of people.

at the barracks shit winds up in the soup and the cook’s daughter is blamed. The cook gets beaten. Meanwhile the guards start getting more and more unhinged. Unit cohesion starts falling apart, they start getting rough with the citizens and paranoid. Some of the ones who took part in the market massacre are going mad out of guilt.

a woman who is super gossipy spreads rumours that Father Laurentius is behind the market riot and the guys who are talking shit about the old kings and stuff. The guards are getting paranoid and extremely angry about it

The farmers outside the city are now having to defend their children from those same merchants trying to kidnap them for dark rituals inside the city. 

The farmers and surrounding villagers are forming militias and some say they're planning to march on the city itself. 

In other words:

 

Chapter Two - Oikaya 10

To put it simply: Things are currently in disaster right now. New Sota City seems about to tear itself apart, and it's only Chapter Two!

...and then we played.

Holy shit.

 The girl is resurrected and restored! And Mother Elise and Lady Marie accidentally give a ton more fuel for the "eat the rich" fires going on!

This is our second full session with the proper 1:1 PVP going on, and it is absolutely. Instead of the game stalling due to traveling and everything else, we created this powerful and ridiculous series of events that were amazing.

Nobody saw it coming. It didn't take much work... well other than me designing the tools. But that's for another blog post.

Point is. This was awesome!

Demon City: Read Thru, Part One

 

Welcome back! This week, we're beginning of my impressions of Demon City.

Every once in a while I run into an RPG that's so coherent that it can only be called foundational. If you read the game, you will walk away with your tastes fundamentally altered. These are the kinds of games that need to be read and played, because they will actually change you, and that's the kind of game you want to play. Stuff like ADnD 1e, Burning Wheel, and Ironsworn, even if you wind up not liking them change the way you do things, and I am of the opinion that such things should be in your library of games.

Demon City is one such entry.

Also: if your favorite RPG (or something monumental like, say ACKSII) isn't on that list, understand I am trying to talk about things that fundamentally change how you interact with the hobby, once read and understood.

Also also: I'm not claiming to make a definitive list. If you need absolute certainty, go to Hell. You'll find plenty of certainty there.

So, why is Demon City so important?

1. The only actually gameable usage of Tarot, at least so far.

2. It utterly understands what it's trying to model.

3. Its mechanics are objectively correct.

Tarot Is Hard to Design Around

My brother-in-law, Kyle, the smartest most erudite person I know, tried to design a tarot RPG for years. He gave up on it. couldn't wrap his head around it. This is the dude who taught me almost everything I know, and whose methods of learning enabled me to go on and do my own things. And he couldn't figure it out.

I've looked at a few games that claim to use tarot cards, like His Majesty the Wyrm. I have not been impressed, at all. They're usuually used as limited number generator, as opposed to fully exploring using cards and images for randomness. There's nothing in these games that I couldn't do with a regular deck of cards.

And Demon City absolutely nails it. You have multiple decks, with cards traveling between them. The layered imagery of tarot is used to full effect, not to mention that Zak doesn't shy away from going full on esoteric when necessay. It's a fine line to walk, but I didn't miss a beat with what Zak was saying.

Well, except the Rider deck is demonic. Fucking burn that thing please.

Demon City Utterly Understands Horror

The thing people do not understand is that cities, as we have constructed them, are abominations. The instant nature stops being a sparring partner and becomes our play-toy, something has gone horribly wrong. And cities are this play-toy dynamic fully expressed. Modern cities are actually horrifying. And Demon City takes every effort to show that it understands this fact.

And it does it by quoting Isaiah 24:12... which becomes all the more poignant once you just look at the full chapter:

Behold, the Lord maketh the earth empty, and maketh it waste, and turneth it upside down, and scattereth abroad the inhabitants thereof.

2 And it shall be, as with the people, so with the priest; as with the servant, so with his master; as with the maid, so with her mistress; as with the buyer, so with the seller; as with the lender, so with the borrower; as with the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him.

3 The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the Lord hath spoken this word.

4 The earth mourneth and fadeth away, the world languisheth and fadeth away, the haughty people of the earth do languish.

5 The earth also is defiled under the inhabitants thereof; because they have transgressed the laws, changed the ordinance, broken the everlasting covenant.

6 Therefore hath the curse devoured the earth, and they that dwell therein are desolate: therefore the inhabitants of the earth are burned, and few men left.

7 The new wine mourneth, the vine languisheth, all the merryhearted do sigh.

8 The mirth of tabrets ceaseth, the noise of them that rejoice endeth, the joy of the harp ceaseth.

9 They shall not drink wine with a song; strong drink shall be bitter to them that drink it.

10 The city of confusion is broken down: every house is shut up, that no man may come in.

11 There is a crying for wine in the streets; all joy is darkened, the mirth of the land is gone.

12 In the city is left desolation, and the gate is smitten with destruction.

13 When thus it shall be in the midst of the land among the people, there shall be as the shaking of an olive tree, and as the gleaning grapes when the vintage is done.

14 They shall lift up their voice, they shall sing for the majesty of the Lord, they shall cry aloud from the sea.

15 Wherefore glorify ye the Lord in the fires, even the name of the Lord God of Israel in the isles of the sea.

16 From the uttermost part of the earth have we heard songs, even glory to the righteous. But I said, My leanness, my leanness, woe unto me! the treacherous dealers have dealt treacherously; yea, the treacherous dealers have dealt very treacherously.

17 Fear, and the pit, and the snare, are upon thee, O inhabitant of the earth.

18 And it shall come to pass, that he who fleeth from the noise of the fear shall fall into the pit; and he that cometh up out of the midst of the pit shall be taken in the snare: for the windows from on high are open, and the foundations of the earth do shake.

19 The earth is utterly broken down, the earth is clean dissolved, the earth is moved exceedingly.

20 The earth shall reel to and fro like a drunkard, and shall be removed like a cottage; and the transgression thereof shall be heavy upon it; and it shall fall, and not rise again.

21 And it shall come to pass in that day, that the Lord shall punish the host of the high ones that are on high, and the kings of the earth upon the earth.

22 And they shall be gathered together, as prisoners are gathered in the pit, and shall be shut up in the prison, and after many days shall they be visited.

23 Then the moon shall be confounded, and the sun ashamed, when the Lord of hosts shall reign in mount Zion, and in Jerusalem, and before his ancients gloriously.

It is important to understand that the description of this city assumes that the people within it are rotten to the core, and have been abandoned so that the harsh and cruel world may take its pound of flesh.

Like it or not, this is modern horror in a nutshell: humanity fucked around, and now it's finding out. Horror is not about personal transgression punished, but the societal consequences of the rape of the natural world turned on its people.

Demon City understands this. Sharply.

The Mechanics Are Objectively Correct 

Look, folks, I don't say this lightly, but there's literally nothing incorrect about these mechanics. I don't mean they're good. I don't mean they're bad. I don't even mean enjoyable. I mean, when I'm reading these, Zak presents solutions to problems that are so good that I immediately know how to fix other games.

On almost. Every. Single. Freaking. Page.

From the incredible initiative system to the downtime actions leading to advancement... all of this is simply correct. There's more than a few games I can think of that would benefit from having these systems be dropped in, with almost no modifications. It's a shame these ideas haven't spread that much. May have to fix that, with my.... miniscule reach. But it's not nothing.

In Conclusion, 

Demon City is not just another horror RPG — it is a foundational work that earns its place alongside the greats. It delivers the rarest achievement in game design: a system that feels inevitable once you’ve seen it. The Tarot implementation is the first one that actually matters. The horror vision is unflinching and thematically profound, rooting modern urban dread in something ancient and true rather than cheap jump scares. And the mechanics are so clean and purposeful that they expose weaknesses in other games while offering elegant fixes you’ll want to steal. 

You may not run Demon City forever. You may not even love every session. But after reading and playing it, you will design, referee, and think about roleplaying games differently. That is the mark of the truly important titles — the ones that don’t just entertain, but reshape the hobby inside you.

We'll go onto the GMing section next week! It is here I leave you. If I do not see you next week, I do not blame you. It is no easy road.

Fixing Burning Wheel With Boot Hill

 

Yeah that’s right: Revised

Burning Wheel, at its best, is a game of raw aggression. You make your Beliefs and then the GM hacks at them in a frenzy that more than casually resembles sharks around a bleeding seal. If I got stuck on a deserted island and you asked me to pick one game, it would come down to Burning Wheel and mine own baby, Crescendo, and I don’t even know how that decision would go down. I would cry either way. 

What the Hell Is Burning Wheel?

Great question! Burning Wheel is a low-fantasy TTRPG, where you play characters who are driven by their Beliefs, Instincts, and Traits (BITs). You are rewarded for causing trouble with these BITs with Artha, which influence your dice rolls.

Beliefs are proactive statements of how you approach the world, which might include short-term goals. You get Artha for causing trouble on behalf of Beliefs and acting against them.

My father still has good in him. I will convince him of this.

My sister is our last hope.

Ben lied to me. I can never trust him again.

Instincts are reactions to specific circumstances. You gain Artha for acting on Instincts when it would get you in trouble.

Always Force-choke physical threats.

When socially confronted, do not back down.

Always protect family.

Traits are passive facts about you. Some of your Traits can net you Artha for acting on them in an entertaining manner.

Angry, Eloquent, Cautious

Now, in the Revised edition, you gain Artha immediately, by the GM. Later editions, like Gold and Gold Revised, move this reward to the end of the session. This is a mistake we'll get to in a bit, trying to address a much larger problem about Burning Wheel that we're going to address with this post!

This combination of BITs and Artha is a perfect storm of perfectly paced aggression. The GM is constantly after your BITs, you're trying to get Artha without getting totally screwed over, and when this game works it works, and nothing else compares, not even close.

Not even Crescendo, mine own baby which is the godson of Burning Wheel... but that's for another day. Crescendo is doing something different.

But

I haven’t seriously played Burning Wheel in five years.  

Now, part of that is because I have been working my ass off on Crescendo. I have done more research and playtesting and soul searching on this one game than others would put into a dozen games. So that takes up time and brain space.

But Burning Wheel has some really severe flaws: ambiguous game set up, Wises, janky Artha rewards, Instincts, and “optional” rules that aren’t actually optional.  As usual, I'm going to handle the concerns, It's my blog, cry about it in the comments!

"Optional" Rules

The Duel of Wits, Fight!, and Range and Cover are some of the most innovative mechanics ever devised. It's best to describe these mechanics are rock/paper/scissors/Spock/GUN on steroids: players pick out a number of actions (usually three) privately, and then reveal them, one at a time, and compare to everyone else in the conflict. There's this huge and beautiful chart that honestly makes my pupils engorge and all sorts of other unseemly things happen.

But.

People do not use these mechanics, by and large. Usually they're having to use them against the GM. Put a pin in this, we're getting back to it. 

The real issue is that Burning Wheel is designed to use these "optional" rules, and if you don't use them... your Artha piles up, and then you get Artha bloat. This is a very common problem with Burning Wheel. And without the extended conflict mechanics, this problem goes from occasional to "Dear God I have way too much Artha", and the reward loop of the game, the thing it does so well, dies.

Instincts

Instincts were covered above. The problem is that the design of the game makes it difficult to actually challenge Instincts. You're essentially begging the GM to hit you with specific situations... except the GM has to focus on two other Instincts and three Beliefs... and that's just for one player. Given how flexible and rich the Beliefs are, Instincts have a bad habit of going to the wayside (there's a reason why Crescendo drops them).

Janky Artha Rewards

Burning Wheel's initial design was for immediate Artha rewards when you act upon your BITs. Up until Revised, this created a dynamic conversation. If you have too much Artha, the GM can ignore you, because you're in a real conversation with the participants at the table. Burning Wheel Gold changed this reward to waiting until the end of the session to hand out Artha. This makes the flow of the game work better, because the GM can't be the sole architect of the bullshit coming at players and watching Artha rewards.  You can't do both, trust me, not long term.

Wises

Wises are skills that a player can roll to force a fact into the fiction. This is great in theory, but it collapses the setting into a Schroedinger's Setting, making it difficult for players to rely upon the setting, and potentially making the GM skittish about introducing facts.

Ambiguous Game Set Up

This is the big one. There is no real game set up. No, there isn't, don't leave your comment. The GM has no guidance on how to set up the fictional situation that will spark the players into making Beliefs.

And this brillitant game  is missing one sentence, that would change everything:

Players can always challenge each other better than any GM.

And it is possible to engineer this.

Enter Boot Hill

 

On an initial look, the 2nd edition of Boot Hill should not be in this conversation. It's a d percentile game. Burning Wheel is a d6 dice pool.

But you know what it does say you should do?

Have the GM design the opening situation. Have the players issue orders, week to week And then forbid sessions of play when the players aren't directly in conflict. 

These simple rules completely redefine Burning Wheel Revised. Suddenly, players are unable to play unless they go after each other... and if the GM wrote a tight initial situation, where the characters he made up are in direct conflict, the players merely have to show up. 

And the thing is that the Burning Wheel Revised has a metric ton of pre-gen'd characters! The GM barely has to do any work! He just grabs some pregens from the books and writes some BITs. He then winds up, lets go, and then spends his sessions principally rewarding loud and proud behavior as it starts conflict. Sure, the GM is going to sometimes need to present some challenges aside from whatever the players are doing. But that won't be the focus.

Those optional mechanics? I notice that players like using them against each other, not the GM. This is because the power differential is too great to use such a mechanic with a GM. With other players? Man, it's like crack.

And if the GM doesn't want to go pregen, but kitbash? Burning Wheel Revised provides the best tools to do it out of all the Burning Wheel versions. The Monster and Magic Burners may be expensive, but Crane really breaks the math down, and provides actual tools that I can personally vouch for. You can very easily draw up a bunch of stuff with confidence.

Conclusion

The truth is, Burning Wheel Revised is a masterpiece hidden inside a game that sometimes fights against itself. Its core loop—aggressive Beliefs, immediate Artha, and those glorious, baroque conflict systems—is one of the best things roleplaying has ever produced. But the ambiguous setup, the optional-but-not-really rules, and the tendency for everything to collapse into GM-vs-players slog have kept it from reaching its full potential for too many groups.

The fix is simpler than we think: steal from Boot Hill.

Let the GM craft one sharp opening situation loaded with conflicting interests. Hand out pregenerated characters with pre-written (or quickly customized) BITs that put the players at each other's throats from minute one. Then declare: No session happens unless the players are directly pursuing conflicting goals. The GM's job shifts from "invent endless opposition" to "facilitate, adjudicate, and reward the glorious chaos that erupts."

Suddenly the Duel of Wits and Fight! stop being scary optional modules and become the main event. Artha flows naturally from real stakes. Instincts matter because other players will exploit them. The table becomes a arena of raw aggression—the very thing Burning Wheel always promised.

I haven't seriously played Burning Wheel in five years. But reading this back, I realize I'm not done with it. I'm just done with the default way people run it.

If you're a BW fan who's been frustrated, try the Boot Hill Setup. Run it hard and mean. You might rediscover why this game, at its best, has no equal.

And if it still doesn't click? Well… that's why I'm building Crescendo.

But trust me, I will always play both.